Are There Any Triggers Here Tonight?
Are There Any Triggers Here Tonight?
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From Pharma to Table: The McDonald's-Pfizer Merger
From Pharma to Table: The McDonald's-Pfizer Merger
McDonald's and Pfizer have announced plans to merge to allow McDonald's myriad meat patents and other intellectual properties to sustain Pfizer's long-term positive economic outlook.
HAPPY MANAGEMENT DAY, AMERICA!!
HAPPY MANAGEMENT DAY, AMERICA!!
Hey America, know how you're always moaning about the decline of the middle class, obscene income inequality, stagnant wages, jobs being outsourced to Asia, no paid vacation or sick days and how you're getting bankrupted by health care costs? Why is that?
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The Brilliant Bug of Carnegie Hall
The Brilliant Bug of Carnegie Hall
A charming fable about how the core American values of inventiveness and stick-to-it-iveness are rewarded.
Nobel Committee Asks Obama “Nicely” To Return Peace Prize
Nobel Committee Asks Obama “Nicely” To Return Peace Prize
Thorbjorn Jagland, chairman of the Nobel Peace Prize Committee, said today that President Obama “really ought to consider” returning his Nobel Peace Prize Medal immediately, including the “really nice” case it came in.
Hillary’s Texts With Trump
Hillary’s Texts With Trump
The Real Hillary Clinton Email Scandal
The Solution?
The Solution?
GOP Proposes New Women's Health Program to Replace Planned Parenthood: Unplanned Parenthood
GOP Proposes New Women's Health Program to Replace Planned Parenthood: Unplanned Parenthood
The GOP in Texas, Arizona, Kansas will support a replacement non-non-profit entity to provide a full raft of women’s health services, including bloodletting, fertility spells, wet-nurses, anti-suicide counseling, and in some cases, chastity belts.
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Secret Diaries of a Terrorist
Secret Diaries of a Terrorist
The continuing misadventures of a hard-working, misogynistic, sadistic, and violent terrorist...
China Buys Walmart, Will Rebrand As GreatWallmart
China Buys Walmart, Will Rebrand As GreatWallmart
In a move that took both Wall Street and Main Street USA by surprise, the world’s largest nation has announced the acquisition of the world’s largest retailer.
In Move to Smash Google Glass, Apple Announces the iBall
In Move to Smash Google Glass, Apple Announces the iBall
The race for your retina is on! Media have always been obsessed with your eyeballs. Attracting them, keeping them, selling you stuff you don't need. Now with its Project Glass reality glasses Google wants to cut out the middleman – you. But Apple has an even better idea...
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Freedom: Sponsored by Koch Industries
Freedom: Sponsored by Koch Industries
We at Koch Industries wanted to know what freedom means. So we got opinions from the people who matter the most: Ordinary Americans.
Zuckerberg Unveils Facebook Unconscious
Zuckerberg Unveils Facebook Unconscious
Today's mandatory article about Facebook.
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weBola: The Dating Site for Ebola Patients
weBola: The Dating Site for Ebola Patients
VIDEO: Life sucks, then you meet someone, then you die
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The New Republicans
The New Republicans
The following message is brought to you by, "The Republican Effort to Totally Revamp Ourselves" or... RETRO.
Bite the Book: New York Times Book Review Chats with Tarzan
Bite the Book: New York Times Book Review Chats with Tarzan
What books are currently on your night stand?
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Facebook Heroes
Facebook Heroes
The Final Edition presents a series of true legends, stories of the greatest warriors for freedom and justice this - or any - generation has ever seen: Facebook Heroes
Video: Drones Evicting Foreclosed Families, Taking Sheriffs' Jobs
Video: Drones Evicting Foreclosed Families, Taking Sheriffs' Jobs
The United States Government is now using military drones to evict families from foreclosed homes. The measure not only increases real estate efficiency, but saves taxpayers by replacing sheriffs and their expensive pensions, healthcare benefits, and mustache maintenance.
Shootout At The U.S. Constitution Corral
Shootout At The U.S. Constitution Corral
Who's responsible for all the gun violence? The First and Second Amendment shoot it out. There are tumbleweeds.
Bible to be Banned in Arizona Under State Law Forbidding Ethnic Studies
Bible to be Banned in Arizona Under State Law Forbidding Ethnic Studies
The Arizona Book Banning and Burning Board, a division of the Arizona Dept of Education, today outlawed any teaching of, or reference to, the Bible in its schools.
Watch Out Peta - Here Comes Meta!
Watch Out Peta - Here Comes Meta!
At steak-sauce-and-whisky-fueled blowout in Dallas this week, META, the first grass-roots carnivorist organization in US history was born.
TFE Exclusive: Noam Chomsky On America’s Cupcake Wars
TFE Exclusive: Noam Chomsky On America’s Cupcake Wars
Noam Chomsky is America’s leading dissident, linguist and small dessert expert. He has agreed to sit for an interview with The Final Edition but only during the commercials.
Idiots with Guns
Idiots with Guns
A public service announcement from Idiots With Guns.
The Best of NYTFE - 600px Ad
The Final Edition Radio Hour
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Are There Any Triggers Here Tonight?
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New York Times: The Final Edition - The Original Parody           The Best of New York Times: The Final Edition
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"Sell It Off" - Taylor Swift's Real NYC Anthem
"Sell It Off" - Taylor Swift's Real NYC Anthem
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New Spielberg Holocaust Epic Awarded Pre-Oscar
New Spielberg Holocaust Epic Awarded Pre-Oscar
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Ken Burns "The Republican Civil War"
Ken Burns "The Republican Civil War"
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The Final Word: Wayne LaPierre Has a Dream
The Final Word: Wayne LaPierre Has a Dream
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Rent-A-Baby
Rent-A-Baby
Hello ladies. Are you 40? Single? Married? Divorced? Overworked? Unemployed? Bumping against the glass ceiling?
Hey, It's Our Thing
Hey, It's Our Thing
Brooklyn hipsters explore modern commerce through social networking, urban tribalism, and suspicious fires.
An OK Cupid Tragic Romance
An OK Cupid Tragic Romance
A tale of modern love and full calendars.
25 Little-Known Facts About the Titanic
25 Little-Known Facts About the Titanic
From an engineering standpoint, the Titanic was not really a ship at all but a gigantic, seagoing zeppelin.
From Here to iTernity: Apple Launches iTombs
From Here to iTernity: Apple Launches iTombs
Still mourning after the death of CEO Steve Jobs, Apple has announced a new line of products to tap into the largely untouched and forgotten post-living market.
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Inside Rush Limbaugh
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Szep Rally
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